Write
your response in five to six sentences.
TS: I think A and B made … => SS1: A SD: a => SS2: B SD: b
reach a consensus, decision by
consensus, consensus on sth
I think attitudes
towards business and professional management are keys to their success. The
family needed to work with and in other countries to expand their businesses.
Business disciplines like honesty and respect are essential to
developing good relationships with others. Also, as their business fields and
markets expand, they need to have dedicated professionals who have competence
in each field. Understanding and using the talent and expertise strengthen
competitive advantage in each business field.
(75 words in 5 sentences)
Akinari
返信削除I think mind towards business and the strength in their close family are the keys to success. They always remember to be modest, honest, hardworking, and respectful. They also didn't stop challenging in new technologies. Their strength in their family enables them to remain strong over the years. They achieved this by separating the owners from the managers and by being very professional.
63 words.
削除Explain clearly the two points stated in the TS in the SSs and SDs.
#1 mind towards=> their mindset towards business success strength …=> close family tie/relationship
#2 respectful of whom?
#3 challenging in new technologies=> Explain more
#4 This explains the second point in the TS.
#5 achieved what? This seems to be another point that is not mentioned in the TS
Which sentence explains the first point in the TS?
Tamaki
返信削除I think making sure that everyone agrees before moving ahead is key to their success. They must be shared their thoughts and understood each other to move ahead. Agreeing everyone leads to improve their ideas because they need to convince others. Also, keeping honest and respectful of older generations is needed to developing and expanding their Group. Keeping that promises makes people trust others.
64 words. Confusing.
削除Reorganize S+V structure. Pay attention to the parts of speech.
#1 everyone=> everyone in the family
#2 They must be shared their thoughts and understood …<=??? Subject-verb problem.
#3 Agreeing everyone=> Reaching a consensus improve their ideas<=? What is the main subject and verb of this sentence?
#4 Keeping (N) and (adj) => is needed to developing and expanding=>
#5 ???
The Zamil Group has grown successfully because the family worked hard together.
返信削除They always remembered the lessons from their parents, such as honesty and respect.
The brothers made decisions by agreement, so everyone agreed before moving forward.
They also expanded into new businesses and used new technology. Also, they keep family and business roles separate, so only skilled people manage the company. Their strong family values and teamwork have helped the company succeed.
73 words.
削除Very well organized and written.
#3 by agreement=> by consensus before …
#4 + #5=> Also, they …, and hired skilled …
I think that making decisions by consensus with Al Zamil's family members when they plan to try a new attempt is the key to their success. Before moving ahead, they made sure that everyone agrees and it helped keep a feeling of unity. Also, sometimes taking risks was necessary to run the company. If they try something new, they would be likely to fail, but they tried to invest in industrial manufacturing and make new products. Consequently, taking risks led to success.
返信削除82 words.
削除Well organized. Break some sentences into two to simplify the explanation.
#1=> Al Zamil’s family members … I think that is the key to …
#2 moving ahead,=> making business decisions, agrees=> agreed. This helped …
#3 sometimes taking risks was …=> they sometimes took risks to …
#4 If they …=> For example, they invested in new business fields, such as …
I think it has grown successfully by making decisions by consensus and separating the owners from the managers. To make dictions by consensus helps keep a feeling of unity because their goal will be clearly and working towards it. Also, separating the owners from the managers is a good way to keep the company strong in the future. If manager’s son was appointed high position, the another employees will get angry because they can’t get a chance. A strong relationship with family and considering the next generation ship are necessary to their growth.
返信削除93 words. Well organized and explained.
削除#2 dictions<=? helps who? because …=> because they can …
#3 to keep the … => to better manage their businesses
#4 manager’s=> a high position another employees=> get angry because … => feel unfair.
#5 and considering the next generation ship => and keeping a strong management team are …
I think it has grown successfully by making decisions by consensus and separating the owners from the managers. To make decisions by consensus helps keep a feeling of unity because they can make their goal clearly and working towards it. Also, separating the owners from the managers is a good way to better manage their businesses. If the owner’s sons get a better position than the other employees, it will get angry because they feel unfair. A strong relationship with family and keeping a strong management team are necessary to their growth.
削除Shizuka
返信削除I think separating the owners from the managers, being very professional, and having positions decided by skills are keys to their success. It is important to have the same consensus. If they don’t have it, they will fall apart. Also the most terrible problem is power differential. It causes power struggle in the company and it could be a factor in bringing down the company. They remove some factors that may become causes of bankruptcy, and made their company grow.
80 words. The TS is not supported clearly by the SSs.
削除#2, 3<= Yes, but do these explain the TS???
#4 problem for what? power differential<=??? it could be …=> it could weaken the company’s competitiveness/strength
#5 “They” <= Who?
become causes of … => could cause …