Write a
paragraph about good ways for families or students to relax.
Include a topic sentence,
three supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence.
Also, write at least one
supporting detail (explanation/example) to one of the supporting sentences.
TS: Being with friends is a great way for students to relax.
SS-1: First of all,
it is easy to be with friends because they know you well.
<=SD You always have something to talk about.
SS-2: Also,
with friends, you can laugh and have fun.
<=SD Laughter is a good
way to reduce stress.
SS-3: Finally, you can talk with friends about
things other than school.
<=SD Because school is a
big part of our lives, students need a break from that topic.
CS: Spending time with friends helps students relax.
Be consistent with you or we.
Use because if necessary.
with your friend/a friend/friends,
Cheer you up,
refreshing/relaxing,
helps you/us feel relaxed,
share your thoughts/feeling with
Be consistent with you or we.
Use because if necessary.
with your friend/a friend/friends,
Cheer you up,
refreshing/relaxing,
helps you/us feel relaxed,
share your thoughts/feeling with
Working something with my friends is a good way to relax.
返信削除First of all, we can help each other and it makes us happy.
Also, we can share our feelings.
Finally, after we work together we can be more close friends.
When we finished we all feel accomplishment.
Doing something together makes us relax.
Very well organized and written!
削除#1 working on something, like A or B, ...
#2 ... other.
It makes us feel united/
#3 ... while working together.
#4 Finally, when we finish the work together, we all feel accomplishment.
Then, we will become closer.
Working on something, like doing our homework with my friends is a good way to relax.
削除First of all, we can help each other. It makes us feel united.
Also, we can share our feelings while working together.
Finally, when we finish the work together, we all feel accomplishment. Then we will become closer.
Doing something together makes us relax.
It is good to have a friend you can trust for students to relax.
返信削除First of all, it is happy to supported by your friends.
You always support your friends if they need.
Also, we have Serious problems which we don't want to talk to our family.
Thinking along is also make stress.
Finally, you can get power which is very strong if you want by your friends.
Mentality is everything.
Having a friend you can trust helps students relax.
Very well organized, but writing needs revision.
削除#2 Who is happy?
to be supported
#3 ... need your help.
#4 ... sometimes have ... talk about to ...
#5 => But if you speak such a problem to someone, you can ease your stress.
#6 ... your friends can cheer you up.
#7 unnecessary
#8 ..., you ... (rewrite)
It is good to have a friend you can trust for students to relax.
削除First of all, it is happy for you to be supported by your friends.
You always support your friends if they need your help.
Also, we sometimes have Serious problems which we don't want to talk about to our family.
But if you speak such a problem to someone, you can ease your stress.
Finally, your friends can cheer you up.
Mentality is everything.
Having a friend you can trust helps students relax.
Talking with friend is a great way for student to relax.
返信削除First of all, if you talk with friend, you can laugh and enjoy talking. So you can forget everything one was worried about.
Also you can speak everything that you concerned about thing. And the mind is better than before.
Finally it is easy to talk with friend. Because you are in the school all of the time a day so you can talk with friend at any time.
For all these reasons, talking with friend helps student relax.
Well organized, but there are some duplicate.
削除#1 ... friends/a friend
#2 ... a friend ... enjoy.
#3 ... about the things that you worried about.
#4, 5 the same as #2 and #3
#6 Finally, ... a friend.
#7 ... during the day, you ...
#8 ... friends/a friend
Talking with friends is a great way for student to relax.
削除First of all, if you talk with a friend, you can laugh and enjoy.
So you can forget about the things that you worried about.
Also you can speak everything that you concerned about thing.
And the mind is better than before.
Finally it is easy to talk with a friend.
Because you are in the school during the day, you can talk with friend at any time.
For all these reasons, talking with friends helps student relax.
Watching variety problems on TV is a great way for students to relax.
返信削除First of all, it always makes fun us.
Also, you can do best to study and do homework after watch them.
Finally, you can talk with friends who watch same TV show.
Watching TV show helps students relax.
Well organized. Add more explanation.
削除#2 ... makes us laugh.
#3 ... can study better/harder after watching TV
Explain:
#4 ... who watched the ...
It is always fun to ...
Being with family is a good way for families to relax.
返信削除First of all, families konw you well, because you spend a long time together.
Also, you can talk about anything with your families.
Finally, families are always on your side.
Spending with family can be natural and relaxing.
Well organized. Need more explanation.
削除#2 ... family members know each other.
They spend ...
#3 ... family.
Your family can ...
#4 Your family always think the best for you.
They may give ...
Being with family is a good way for families to relax.
削除First of all, family members know each other, because they spend a long time together.
Also, your family can talk about anything with your family.
Finally, your family always think the best for you.
Spending with family can be natural and relaxing.
Exercise is a great way for students to relax.
返信削除First, it is easy to take exercise.
You can exercise anywhere.
Also, it is good for your health.
Because you can sleep well when exercising.
Finally, it can help us to forget bad memories.
It is refresh our body and soul.
Exercise helps students relax.
Very well organized and written!
削除#2 ... to exercise.
#3 ... anywhere anytime.
#5 You can ... after ...
#6 ... you ...
#7 ... refreshing to your ...
First, it is easy to exercise.
削除You can exercise anywhere anytime.
You can sleep well after exercising.
Finally, it can help you to forger bad memories.
It is refreshing to your body and soul.
Sleeping is a great way for student to relax.
返信削除First, we can forget everything.
Our worries make you stress.
Also, we can heal our mind and body.
Sleep is for heal, we can relax and welcome good morning the next day.
Finally, it feels good for us when we are sleeping.
Sleeping important time for humans, so it feels very good and relaxing.
When you want to relax, sleeping is a good answer for us.
Well organized and written!
削除#2 ... while sleeping.
#3 => Bad memories ...
#5 => We can start a good day after a good sleep.
#6 unnecessary. Just #7 is OK.
#7 ... answer.
Sleeping is a great way for student to relax.
削除First, while sleeping, we can forget everything.
Our bad memories make you stress.
Also, we can heal our mind and body.
We can start a good day after a good sleep because sleep is for heal.
Finally, it feels good for us when we are sleeping.
Sleeping important time for humans, so it feels very good and relaxing.
When you want to relax, sleeping is a good answer for us.
Staying home is good way for students to relax.
返信削除First of all, don't mind anything.
It can reduce stress
Also, doing nothing can reduce stress.
It is fun!!
Finally, you can study favorite subject only.
Do not study dislike Subjects makes us happy.
Spending at house helps students relax.
Well organized, but be careful with grammar/verb usage.
削除#1 ... a good way ...
#2 ... you don't worry about ...
#4 ... at home is ...
#5 And it is also fun/luxury.
#6 ... your favorite ...
#7 => Studying the subject you like makes you feel great.
Studying home is a good way for students to relax.
削除First, You don't worry about anything.
It can reduce stress.
Also, doing nothing at home is reduce stress.
And it is also fun!!
Finally, you can study your favorite subject only.
Studying the subject you like makes you feel great.
Spending at house helps students relax.
Talking with friend is a great way for student to relax.
返信削除First of all, when you talk with friend, you can enjoy. Also you can speak everything that you wondering..
Finally it is easy to talk with friend at school.
For all these reasons, talking with friend helps student relax and become positive.
Need more explanation.
削除your friend/a friend/friends
#2 -> Next sentence: For example, ...
#3 ... you are worried.
#4 -> Next sentence: You go to school ...
Watching movie with friends is a good way to relax.
返信削除First of all. it always makes us happy.
Also, you can listen to friends feelings.
Finally, you can talk with friends during movie.
Watching movie helps you and your friends relax.
Need more explanation.
削除#1 a movie
#3 ... talk about what you felt or thought about the movie
#4 talk during the movie?????